In 1979 world was shocked by story of fourteen-year-old girl from Berlin – Christiane Felscherinow, published as "We children from zoo station” It’s a story about girl's transformation from a bright and promising child to the walking cadaver of a heroin addict..
At first Christiane — a pretty smart, good-looking girl — is only interested in the Berlin nightlife. In “Hell on Earth” a place called Gropistadt Christiane meets Detlef, a boy her age.
She did a lot of things just like he did. And it all started with smoking wheat, and then taking pills, ...and then being addicted to heroin. The consequence of her
self-destructive behaviour, is that at the age of fourteen, she's an
experienced heroin junkie residing at the infamous Zoo station in Berlin She sold her body to get the money for the next “shot”. She tried a few times to get rid of her addiction. unfortunately vainly. Christiane slowly withers away from her svelte beauty into an emaciated, filthy girl who vomits blood.
I think it's good to publish books like this. I recommend this book for everyone. You can see how it affects people, and what some have to do to get the money for their drugs! No anti-drug message in any commercial, movie, or book has ever come close to affecting me to the extent that this novel has. I always thought that it is simple to rid the “innocent” drugs but when I read this book I know that if you were addicted to it once, you have a hard time to stay away from it!
Zaproszone osoby: 1 Pomógł: 75 razy Posty: 974 Skąd: Kwidzyn/Elbląg
Wysłany: Sro 20 Lut, 2008 11:20 am
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
In 1979 world was shocked by story of fourteen-year-old girl from Berlin
A few missing articles here.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
"We children from zoo station”
Capitalization.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
"We children from zoo station” It’s a story about
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
addict..
Here's our missing full stop
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
At first Christiane
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
Christiane — a pretty smart, good-looking girl —
I wouldn't use dashes here.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
In “Hell on Earth” a place called Gropistadt
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
Detlef, a boy her age.
A preposition missing here
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
wheat
You don't mean "wheat" here, do you?
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
and then taking pills, ...and then being addicted to heroin.
"And then..., and then..." doesn't sound very nice.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
The consequence of her
self-destructive behaviour, is that at the
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
at the age of fourteen, she's an
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
Zoo station in Berlin She
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
She sold her body to get
I know she did it repeteadly - read the book ten times or so. So I think "would" would come in handy here.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
body to get the money for the next “shot”
Redundant article, I believe.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
She tried a few times to get rid of her addiction.
Word order.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
n. u
Capitalization
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
She tried a few times to get rid of her addiction. unfortunately vainly.
I'd try to make one sentence out of those. Also, you could make use of the expression "in vain."
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
get the money for their drugs!
Redundant article and, I believe, possessive pronoun.
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
movie, or book
Punctuation
OlCiia_19 napisał/a:
rid the “innocent” drugs
A preposition missing here
Generally well-written. A few good phrases. Good vocabulary. However what you ought to work on is punctuation. Also, consider using some linking words.
Nie możesz pisać nowych tematów Nie możesz odpowiadać w tematach Nie możesz zmieniać swoich postów Nie możesz usuwać swoich postów Możesz głosować w ankietach Nie możesz załączać plików na tym forum Możesz ściągać załączniki na tym forum